


Have You Heard

by kmou



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Crack, Fluff and Crack, Humor, M/M, Male Slash, Out of Character, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2004-09-17
Updated: 2004-09-17
Packaged: 2021-03-16 12:35:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 392
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29950077
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kmou/pseuds/kmou
Summary: "Have you heard?" — "Heard what, Blaise?"Prequel to "Perfect."
Relationships: Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter





	Have You Heard

**Author's Note:**

> Characters are OOC.
> 
> This fic has a sequel, "Perfect."

"Have you heard?"

"Heard what, Blaise?"

"About Potter's... you know."

"No, I don't know. Potter's what? Messy hair? Everyone knows about that."

"God, you're such a dumb blonde, Draco"

-gasp-

"Oh, do shut up. Potter's _broomstick_."

"... what about it?"

"It's..." -demonstrates the length of Potter's _broomstick-_

 _-_ blinks- "How do _you_ know?"

"Girls talk."

"Blaise, you're not a girl."

"But I'm a lady's man."

-snorts-

"... Shut up."

"So Potter's huge, ehh?"

"Not just huge; humongous!"

-gasp- "Humongous?!"

-chuckles- "Yep!"

"I got to see this for myself!"

* * *

"I'll see you in the Great Hall, Harry."

"Ok, see you Ron." -takes off clothes and steps into the shower-

-sneaks into the Gryfifndor locker room and hides behind a locker.- 'Now where is Potter? I remember that Finnegan boy telling me that he takes his shower after everyone leaves.' -shudders with disgust- 'Never am I letting a Gryffindor touch my _beautiful_ , _beautiful_ hair.' -sees Potter in the shower, and whispers under his breath- "Holy shit! Potter's hung!"

-Harry hums to himself while the water runs down his body-

"God, Potter's not so bad when you see how big he is..." -gets hard- "I want _that_ up my arse! Yes, Draco, you will seduce him! MUAHAHAHAHAHA!"

-Harry turns around quickly- "Hello?! Someone there?"

Silence.

-Draco mutters under his breath- 'Nice going, Draco. You're supposed to be spying on him, not making up plans to fuck him.'

-Harry figures no one is there so continues to shower-

"Damn it, but he's so fucking hot from here! That's it; I'm fucking him right here, right now!" -strips, walks up to Harry, and taps him on the shoulder-

-jumps and turns around- "EEEEEK-... MALFOY?!"

-pounces on Potter-

"MALFOY, WHAT TH-AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

-shoves Harry down, impales himself onto Harry, and starts to ride him-

"FUCK! Malfoy, SHIT!"

"Ah God, you feel _so_ good!

-Harry shoves Draco off of him, turns Draco around, and enters him-

"OH YEAH!"

-pounds into Draco, panting-

"RIGHT THERE, RIGHT TH-ARRRRGGGGG!"

-grabs onto Draco's cock and pumps-

"FUCK HARRY!" -orgasms-

-thrusts and orgasms-

-gasping- "Oh god, that's the best I've ever had... I never came so hard in my life!"

-chuckles- "Nice to know. Now explain to me why you jumped me! We don't even like each other!"

"I'll show you how much I like you now and why I _pounced_ on you..." -winks and sucks Harry-

"FUCK!"


End file.
